ESSAY

ANNOUNCEMENT:

This is something I’ve been struggling to come to terms with PERSONALLY for a long time. It’s been an all consuming process of introspection but I think I’ve had a realization finally about my true identity. And now that I’ve done that, now that I’ve had that difficult conversation with myself, I think I’m ready to share it with you all: my friends and family.

I don’t take this lightly. I’m afraid you all liked me for who you thought I was and not who I truly am. But I feel like my life until now has been a lie and I want to tell the truth. I’m afraid you’ll all feel tricked, like you never really knew me. But I have to get this off my chest. It’s my true identity and I need it out in the open.

That’s why I, Ike Flitcraft, finally feel confident enough to out myself as Sergey, a hacker sitting in a server farm deep in the Russian wilderness attempting to influence your elections and destroy your democracy. But you, like all my friends and family here in Russia, can call me Gey for short.

I, IKE FLITCRAFT, AM ACTUALLY GEY.

It is going to shock you to find my life isn’t anything like the lie I’ve been telling you I live as “Ike Flitcraft”. I’m not the happy go-lucky american boy I’ve been pretending I was. I am sad, cursed Russian man who has accepted who he is and wants you to bend to the will and propoganda of Vladimir Putin.

I don’t spend my days on the beach in the sun kissing my beautiful girlfriends. I spend days doing things you’d find disgusting with other men in dark basements all across the Russian tundra.

I’m not chasing my starry-eyed dreams across hollywood. I am fending off nightmares and wolves in the woods surrounding the KGB gulag I am trapped in.

I don’t spend my afternoons in coffee shops on Santa Monica boulevard kissing my beautiful girlfriends. I spend my afternoons maintaining fake girlfriends’ fake Facebook accounts and checking into random hollywood coffee shop I’ve never even been in the same hemisphere as.

This is one of 200 accounts like this I’ve created. They’re all lies. The truth is though, I am proud of this. This is who I am. And I want to be accepted. Just as I want you to accept your democracy looks foolish. I was born this way. I was born in a dark Russian basement which previously held political prisoners. And now, I suppose, quite poetically, I am one of those political prisoners. The ultimate prison though, is the separation I feel from all of you: “Ike”’s friends and family. Sometimes you feel like perfect strangers to me because you are perfect strangers to me and I must ask myself: “Is worth it to destroy United States from inside out?” Today I say “No. Is not worth it”. So to the strangers I never met who fell in love with this fictional boy Ike Flitcraft: I love you. Your country has fallen to us.

I want you to understand WHY I do the things I do. So that maybe, just maybe, you can learn to love me for being Gey, and understand my struggle. I want you to know what it’s like to be Gey.

Being Gey and living in Russia means being beaten and censored daily. Now that I have PROUDLY installed a dictator who worships the leadership style of Vladimir Putin in YOUR country, you TOO will understand what that’s like. I am proud of that.

Being Gey and living in Russia means facts are distorted and the truth is hard to find. Now that I have PROUDLY installed a dictator who worships the leadership style of Vladimir Putin in YOUR country, you TOO will understand my struggle. I am proud of that.

Being Gey and living in Russia means occasionally being asked to beat a gay or even beat a member of a gay rock band. Now that I have PROUDLY installed a dictator who worships the leadership style of Vladimir Putin in YOUR country, you TOO will understand my struggle. I am proud of that.

Being Gey and living in Russia means fearing for your life for speaking out. Now that I have PROUDLY installed a dictator who worships the leadership style of Vladimir Putin in YOUR country, you TOO will understand my struggle. I am proud of that.

I hope you understand this is my life. And it is a bad one. It is who I am. I want you to share it. And now you will. Because we own you. We manipulated you. Ike Flitcraft, the news we showed you, the accounts we created, the information we leaked, the things we shouted, the climate of polarization and of fear we created. It was all a lie. And you bought it. And we sold it. And it was simple. Because you were scared and angry. And I am too. And I am too. I’ve been like this since I was born. And now you understand what it’s like to be Gey and live in Russia. Or you will. In 10 days.

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