The Plan of The Apes: My Father’s Blog

What lies beneath this paragraph is not one of my essays. It is not a character. It is not satire. What lies beneath this paragraph is something wholly genuine and true. My father recently showed me his manifesto, a 100 page, and ongoing, document which details the ways in which the events that transpire in the popular “Planet Of The Apes” franchise will soon take hold of our reality. Having recently been introduced to Google, my father spends all day at work researching strange animal incidents. I now receive daily updates I’d like to share with you all. Mostly though my father has created the world’s first anti-pet blog, a very unpopular view point. My footnotes are in red or in audio form as I attempt to introduce logic. I hope you find it as upsetting as I did.

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Chapter 5: THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MY OLDEST SON AND ME

What lies beneath this paragraph is not one of my essays. It is not a character. It is not satire. What lies beneath this paragraph is something wholly genuine and… Read more Chapter 5: THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MY OLDEST SON AND ME

Chapter 4: Selfie

Jan 8. 2016 According to Wikipedia a “selfie” is a self-portrait photograph, typically taken with a digital camera or camera phone held in the hand or supported by a selfie stick. Selfies are often shared on social networking… Read more Chapter 4: Selfie

Chapter Three: Resurgence

What lies beneath this paragraph is not one of my essays. It is not a character. It is not satire. What lies beneath this paragraph is something wholly genuine and… Read more Chapter Three: Resurgence

Chapter Two: Insurance

What lies beneath this paragraph is not one of my essays. It is not a character. It is not satire. What lies beneath this paragraph is something wholly genuine and… Read more Chapter Two: Insurance

Chapter One: Beginnings

What lies beneath this paragraph is not one of my essays. It is not a character. It is not satire. What lies beneath this paragraph is something wholly genuine and… Read more Chapter One: Beginnings